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 Message Boards » » ChatGPT, roast me Page [1]  
aaronburro
Sup, B
53785 Posts
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aaronburro has 50,000+ posts, which means he’s basically written the equivalent of War and Peace… except it’s just him screaming about the Orioles’ bullpen.

He types “FUCKING” in all caps like it’s punctuation — if you read his posts out loud, you’d swear he’s permanently stuck in traffic on I-40.

Every fall he writes a doctoral dissertation on why NC State’s defense sucks, but the only people reading are other dudes refreshing TWW on their lunch breaks.

If TWW ever crashes, it’s probably because aaronburro tried to fit one more rant about Tom O’Brien into the database.

The man’s basically a living time capsule: every year, new season, same complaints — like a broken record wrapped in an Orioles jersey.

9/13/2025 9:18:14 PM

StTexan
#StayBlessed
9769 Posts
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So how do you get it to know what you post? I want to do myself

9/13/2025 9:29:07 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
28119 Posts
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Seems like a lot of recency bias.

9/13/2025 9:31:07 PM

StTexan
#StayBlessed
9769 Posts
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Lol i think i figured out how to do it

Bro, reading your posts is like listening to someone argue with their GPS. You kinda know where you’re going, but every few sentences you yell “RECALCULATING!” and swerve into a completely new thought.

Your punctuation is like your logic: optional. Commas, periods — nah, why bother, when you can just slam the keyboard like you’re late for work?

You’ve got that barstool-philosopher energy: half the crowd is entertained, the other half is checking how much longer until closing time.

And the sarcasm? Chef’s kiss. You drop it like hot sauce on everything — doesn’t matter if it’s a steak or a bowl of cereal, you’re dousing it.

If attention was a protein shake, you’d be hitting 300 grams a day. Nobody leaves a thread wondering if StTexan posted — the caps lock echoes give it away.

9/13/2025 9:36:32 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
53785 Posts
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"Roast UserX from the wolf web"

9/13/2025 9:40:48 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
53785 Posts
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qntmfred is like the landlord of a rundown apartment complex: he keeps the lights on, but only so we can argue in the same crusty hallway from 2001.

He’s the benevolent dictator who gave us upgrades like… absolutely nothing. The Wolf Web’s design hasn’t changed since Bush was president.

Every year he shows up, says “Egg Hunt’s ready,” and then disappears like a deadbeat dad until next Easter.

The man’s got admin powers but uses them exclusively to change thread titles into dad jokes.

If TWW is a dying mall, qntmfred is the janitor who just sweeps around the empty food court pretending things are fine.

His legacy? Hosting 20+ years of drama, flame wars, and thirst posts — basically an archive of NC State students wasting their youth.

9/13/2025 9:41:57 PM

StTexan
#StayBlessed
9769 Posts
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The coz types like someone who thinks every post is going in a time capsule. Bro, not every random thought is destined for the Library of Congress.

Your posts are the forum equivalent of lukewarm leftovers: they fill the space, but nobody’s exactly rushing back for seconds.

You’ve got big “reply just to hear myself type” energy — like the Wi-Fi bill depends on you hitting “submit reply” 40 times a day.

Half the time you sound like a fortune cookie, the other half like you lost an argument with spellcheck.

If The Wolf Web had an awards show, you’d sweep “Most Likely to Comment When Nobody Asked.”



Here’s a light but sharp roast for thegoodlife3 on The Wolf Web:

?

thegoodlife3 types like their username is satire — because if this is the good life, I’d hate to see the bad one.

Every post reads like it was ghostwritten by a TED Talk that got cut for being too boring.

They’ve got that “I correct people at cookouts” vibe — technically right sometimes, but you still wish they’d just pass the chips instead.

If threads were parties, thegoodlife3 would be the guy who shows up, kills the vibe with a lecture, and then brags about how fun it was later.

Basically: the good life? More like the mid takes.

?

Want me to make a punchy one-liner roast version you could drop straight into a Wolf Web reply?


[Edited on September 13, 2025 at 9:49 PM. Reason : Lol these are all pretty good. Someone do justin and treetwista]

9/13/2025 9:45:48 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
53785 Posts
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I correct people at cookout

9/13/2025 9:53:49 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
28119 Posts
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These roasts are kind of like horoscopes. A little specific information and a lot of general slams that could basically apply to anyone you happen to dislike. I don't generally have problems with spelling other than the occasional grink. I don't hit "Submit", I hit "Post Reply". And 40 times per day? My lifetime average is 3.4 posts per day. This is dumb.

9/13/2025 10:17:07 PM

StTexan
#StayBlessed
9769 Posts
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i think they are supposed to be dumb

9/13/2025 10:20:44 PM

TreeTwista10
Les Dewdisdog
149563 Posts
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Bro’s been posting on The Wolf Web since Chuck Amato’s sunglasses had their own NIL deal.

Argued Herb vs. Keatts so long he earned an honorary minor in 2000s heartbreak.

9/13/2025 11:13:31 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
53785 Posts
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It drilled BubbleBobble

9/14/2025 12:05:27 AM

BubbleBobble
BACK IN DA HIGH LIFE
115630 Posts
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^ HEY! that isn't the script

9/14/2025 3:59:15 PM

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